SISTER STRAIN My sister never wants to spend time with me — should I just give up on her?

DEAR DEIDRE: MY sister was taken into care when she was four and I was 15 –  because my dad had drug problems and Mum just couldn’t cope.

She was adopted but we were allowed contact twice a year. We would sit in a room with a social worker, for an hour or two. When she turned 18, we then made our own arrangements.

Mum has now died and I now usually meet my sister in a café. But she’s never wanted more than just that hour or so, twice a year.

She’s 21 and I am wondering whether to give up, as I always feel I’m treading on eggshells.
Should I let her go?

DEIDRE SAYS:

Keep up the contact. Both of you went through a lot of childhood trauma. That haunts your meetings now but it is also a bond. In time, it is likely she will feel able to be more open.
Meanwhile, find support to heal your own emotional wounds.

_{Source: (The Sun Newspaper – Deidre Sanders – 20 Jul 2020)}

Vocabulary

• strain a state of worry and tension caused by a difficult situation.
  Tradução > tensão, estresse, sobrecarga, pressão.
• give up on sb to stop hoping that someone will improve and stop trying to help or change them.
  Tradução > desistir de alguém.
• be taken into care to be sent to a care organization run by the social services.
  Tradução > ser acolhida, levada a um abrigo.
• cope to do something well in a difficult situation.
  Tradução > lidar, enfrentar, suportar, aguentar, dar conta, superar.
• social worker someone whose job is to help people who have problems because they are poor, old, have difficulties with their family, etc.
  Tradução > assistente social, serviço social.
• turned 18 reached a particular age (18).
  Tradução > fez 18 anos, completou 18 anos.
• make arrangements to organize, plan, or prepare.
  Tradução > tomar providências, tomar medidas, fazer acordos
• give up to stop doing something that you are trying hard to do.
  Tradução > desistir, abrir mão
• tread on eggshells to be extremely careful about what you say or do because you do not want to upset or offend someone.
  Tradução > pisar em ovos, tomar muito cuidado para não ofender alguém.
• keep up to maintain contact or relations with someone.
  Tradução > manter, continuar.
• go through to experience a difficult or unpleasant situation.
  Tradução > passar por, atravessar (um problema)
• haunt to cause repeated suffering or anxiety.
  Tradução > assombrar, perseguir, atormentar
• bond a close connection joining two or more people.
  Tradução > vínculo, ligação, laço, elo
• in time eventually, with the passing of time.
  Tradução > com o tempo, na hora certa, no devido tempo, com o passar do tempo.
• meanwhile at or during the same time.
  Tradução > enquanto isto, nesse meio tempo
• wound a feeling of sadness, anger, etc, that is caused by something bad.
  Tradução > ferida, ferimento.